Hey, Ey, Ey, Ey!
Part 5 – Accommodations
(Where We Sleep, Snack, and Judge the Towels)
Narrator Voice (imagine that slow, majestic Spongebob intro):
“Ahh yes… the staterooms. Just like hotels… but smaller… and occasionally windowless. Some have balconies. Some don’t. Some feel like a royal retreat. Others feel like a well-decorated closet with plumbing.”
But fear not, Blissfits! We are Club Level—that mystical in-between tier where our balconies are bigger, our keycards are purple (yes, PURPLE, the color of kings, queens, and questionable cocktails), and our bathroom products smell vaguely of bergamot, which we assume is fancy citrus.
Club Balcony Suite – the Parental Units
Savor every sunrise and sunset together from the privacy of your large balcony.
Now, a word of honesty: our rooms will not face the port. Translation—when the ship sails away, we’ll be waving at the open ocean instead of the dockworkers. If you want that Instagram-worthy shot of Long Beach disappearing, you’ll need to leave your balcony throne and venture to the deck with the commoners.
Young Adult Party Room
Relax in your sitting area. Or step out onto your private balcony and breathe in the fresh air while taking in amazing views.
Exclusive Club Balcony Suite Amenities
(Read dramatically, like a royal decree):
- A distinctive purple keycard (be prepared to flaunt it like a VIP Costco membership).
- Pre-book dining 125 days out (because nothing says vacation like scheduling your steak four months in advance). DONE!
- Pre-book entertainment 21 days out (we suggest penciling in karaoke shame as early as possible).
- 1 complimentary valet laundry—so choose wisely which socks or underwear are most worthy of professional cleaning.
- 1 bottle of sparkling wine upon embarkation—perfect for celebrating, or for bribing new cruise friends.
- Treats delivered twice per voyage—mystery snacks that will make you question: is this a cookie… or a cheese puff?
- The Bliss Collection by Norwegian™—fine linens and pillows that make you forget your mattress at home is overdue for replacement.
- Bergamot bathroom products (smell like a citrus orchard while you contemplate life at sea).
- Bathrobes, because obviously.
- TV, fridge, safe, and hair dryer—aka the “don’t worry, you’re not camping” package.
- Sitting area (for sitting, or piling up the towels you definitely stole from the pool deck).
- Lower beds arranged as a queen (translation: cruise snuggles are mandatory).
- Coffee maker and ice bucket (by request, because apparently, these are too luxurious to assume).
- 24-hour room service menu (charges may apply—welcome to capitalism at sea).
- Continental breakfast menu (no charges! Because who doesn’t love free muffins?)
